November 04, 2007

this one time i wrote a blog...


well i figure enough time has past that i ought to type some thoughts. i cannot even begin to tell of all the events that have passed lately. with a hesitant heart, i decide not to travel that route. this is such an excessive amount of information there. so i now choose to simply write of my present situation... Linnea and i have just crossed the 7 month leg of our journey as a couple. its been just amazing to date her. i have learned so much of myself as i venture in learning truly of another person. such is the fires of life. i see as in a mirror my own reflection. its been enjoyable. we get out of it what we put into it i find. i find that i am pretty amazed by her. often i see new sides of her. she steps out in a strength i have never seen before...she takes an angle in a discussion other that i would have guessed. little things. we are in the process of coming to know the hearts of one another. thats a process that will probably never end, a fact i rejoice in. shes a girl that has so much strength to love others, i see this in the way shes does her work on the streets. its awesome for sure.

i achieved the 2 year mark as a staff here in September. thats something i am for sure proud of. this city seems to pour people out like water. dry them like leather. we for sure have a spring of Living Water to go to and fresh Oil to anoint us, but for some that feels oh so far away. why is that?!?! i do not know. however, Hebrews 12:1-2 are banner over me.

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

that verse is ever before me.

i am a happy man here in amsterdam. glad to be the son of my Father. pleased to walk with Him in a land few dare to tread in the name of Peace. thank you for reading this...more later, for sure.
Posted by willstacken at 21:52:20 | Permanent Link | Comments (1) |

February 23, 2007

an Ethiopian expierence...

Hey All...

Its mid-February here in Amsterdam...and I swear spring is quickly approaching. The temps are in the 50s and buds are leaping forth from many a tree. There is a joy that comes with approach of spring. The icy cold of winter begins to melt off and give rise to a freshness that fills the air...Although we had hardly experienced winter here in Holland. Thanks to Al Gore who caused and fuels all global warming (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/al_gore_caught_warming_globe_to). Anyway...As always, I have had many experiences that are so very worthy of others knowing about, but; I am so busy, and lack some time management skills, that I just don't get around to it. But...In this writing I want to share one that stick out. Its a lunch I had with an Ethiopian/Eritrean friend of mine.

These two North East African countries have such an awesome culture and history to them, and Markus (as I will call him) is a product of them. I wish I could say that I knew him better, but time with hopefully give rise to that. He is a man who has had a turbulent past, yet finds solace in Christ. He was raised with Coptic Christian surroundings and moved to Amsterdam around 15 yrs ago. Sadly, the streets opened there abusive hands to him and gave him empty comfort. Yet, the Lord rescued him and is returning his life to him. Sean and I were blessed to share a meal with this amazing man. He had us over to his new apartment some weeks back, for an experience I will never forget. It was a rainy afternoon and we stood on his doorstep waiting for him to let us in. When he finally did; we walked into to his small, yet tidy,apartment in the east of Amsterdam. It was warmly lit with lamps and candle, and the sent of incense lingered int he air. Carpets, cushions and wooden tables spoke of his African heritage. We sat enjoyed time drinking tea and talking about all that God had done in our lives over these past years. He served us an amazing meal though, it was simply his cultural food from Ethiopia. It was portions of rice, vegetables, beans, and spices. All set within a bowl in there own place. It was delicious! He play Cd's of artist from his homeland. They melody's, tons and rhythms were classic of what I know of this area...However, they blended with the food...the scents...the peaceful lighting to make a time that touched my heart and senses. I told Sean afterward, that I wish ministry always felt this good! We fellowship and encouraged one another in such a biblical way!...It was amazing. Its times like these I really love what God has led me into...I hope and pray that all of you can experience such wonders as these....

take care...in Him....Will
Posted by willstacken at 12:32:01 | Permanent Link | Comments (1) |

January 21, 2007

a composition of surrealistic moments.


I write this tonight at 12:26 am. Early in the evening, by Amsterdam standards. I will be blunt and honest in this chronicle tonight. I aim for this state often, but I feel sometimes unable to do that. But here's the free-wheelingsness of my pen-like finger tips.

The sounds of the Arctic. The creaking of ice flowing slowly over a solid watery solemn state. A windswept plain. These sounds fill the void between earth and sky. They are given to an area with no one to receive them. Yet, to those who can catch them, they are a rhythmic melody that is unmistakable.

The reason I pen these is not quite clear to me. I remember hearing these sounds in the winters of my youth. As I grew up on the lake I would listen to these surrealistic tones. Tones that would flash for a brief second. As wind blows over the frozen expanse it causes movement and shifting. Ever heard it? Its beautiful. "A life of Arctic sounds" is an album by Modest Mouse and I always associate its title with this peaceful melody from my childhood...and this utterance equals peace to me.

Yet, there are so many times when I do not posses that most glorious of feelings. I despise "awkward" feelings. I know that no one can give you a feeling. They belong to the bearer. They are purely a response to external stimulation. They are a constructed response. I know that I am not alone. I know that all who read this can relate. Its funny how much I experience this. I feel that I need to write about this tonight. I feel it in crowds of people I know. People that know me. Why does this response come? I would not say it is anxiety. It causes people to "fidget"..."zone out"...I am sure that every one handles it differently. But where is the root? This is the question. There are bits of self-consciousness interwoven in it. Who isn't a bit self-conscious, if they are truly honest. I even venture to say that I am not overly self-conscious, just aware of..."me."

So, it is these sorts of events that cause me to dwell on the idea of surrealism them. They are swirls of reality. When people feel awkward they begin to mix the present events with a myriad of events going on in the world of there minds. What do you think about? What rolllllssss through your mind in an awkward moment?

Well...To those of you who really know me, you will know that my mind runs a mile a minute. Its incredible to even me how many random thought processes are going on in my mind at any given moment. But, all this is the process of maturity in my mind. Harnessing this God-given world within the box atop my shoulders. The work of refinement and coming into a Christ-likeness in all areas of life. Jesus was able to think, feel and express all feelings and emotions. He processed them out, scripture shows it; this is my belief. Anyway...

That's me...its now 1 am so I better go. in Him...Will
Posted by willstacken at 01:05:18 | Permanent Link | Comments (2) |

January 18, 2007

Chronicles of a Nomad


Hey Dudes.

2007 has begun and it has been an amazing journey thus far, "I can scarce take it in." I have moved out of my apartment in the Oude West of Amsterdam. I am sad to leave that property. I enjoyed living there and the whole neighborhood, which was very Turkish actually. Many a night I heard cars pull up to the stop light, blaring rap music in Arabic. I enjoyed living there with Sam the Scotsman. What can you do...Now I am reduced to the wandering of a Nomad, of sorts. I am living in an apartment owned by YWAM for 3 weeks. Its atop of one of YWAM's buildings. Its a beautiful place. Its got hard wood floors and exposed beams lifting high the white ceiling. Its so beautiful. It over looks the area I work in, the Red Light District. The apartment will then house the leader of the prayer ministry, Marietha. So, I a blessed to call this place home for a few weeks. After that, some friends of mine are going home to Brazil for 2 months and needed someone to house-sit there apartment for the time...I was very pleased to help them! Housing in the center of Amsterdam can sometimes be hard to obtain, but doors can and do open often. So, I am in the process of searching for that.

Ministry life has been going amazing. There is one guy that a team of us doing some discipleship stuff with. We have had countless meetings with him, gone to his house to pray, helped him get involved with teachings and churches that will aid him in his journey of recovery. Its been really encouraging. However, in this walk with him I have been learning so much about how people function and relate. Man, what I do is such precious and fragile work. Sometimes it hits me, I am trying teach and impact people in ways that will lead to a changed and purposeful lifestyle. I am seeking to meet people who society has said cannot change and not worth the time it would take. These people are just as much Gods creation as you or I! They are the victims of there own choices. They are the Prodigals who have run from home. People have abused them in countless ways, and they have in turn treated others accordingly.

Its a call to perseverance love that I must answer. I need to walk with them one day at a time. Its Gods work of change that must happen. He is the one who changes hearts. Not me. I am called to love them and daily be a witness of who God is. To show that He is unchanging, yet constantly revealing new sides and characteristics of Himself. Yet, He always flows in the same pattern. His heart never changes, it is always loving. It is that love that I have seen change lives.

A good friend of mine just went down to Zuid Afrika (South Africa) for a one month long trip. So I will miss him here. Hes a Dutch guy, with a very Dutch sense of humor. Hm...What else. There is a team of students here from Bethel University. This is the rival college of Northwestern, where I graduated from. They have been a blessing here. They are studying a bit of Amsterdam works and functions. Its to hear a Minnesota accent on English again.

So that's me. I am always open to questions and hope to hear from anyone who takes the time to read this "stuff" that comes from my head and heart...Seeya....Will (willstacken@gmail.com)
 
Posted by willstacken at 12:03:35 | Permanent Link | Comments (1) |

January 01, 2007

a new years story.

Fresh Day...Fresh Year.
 
I woke up this morning after a rather nice New Years Eve. I was able to go with a friend to his Moms house for dinner. This was another nice Dutch experience. I enjoy these whenever I get to have them! From there I went to work in the Cleft until 1:30. This was an interesting night though. We had a man come in who I had never seen around the area. He was a bit "peppy" (for lack of a better term.) He had obviously recently smoked stimulant like Cocaine/Crack. This is a common sight in the District, however; it never ceases to break my heart and I utterly refuse to let it become "normal." Anyway. He was able to focus and hold conversation. He told me his name and that he came from Suriname. He was a bit paranoid and his thoughts were jumbled and quick. However, what told me is that he came from a local church here in Amsterdam that also has its own rehab center for chemical addicts. He said he was in there program for something like 8 months and then actually work in the program for 6 months doing prayer ministry. I have heard stories similar to his. He was familiar with the Scriptures, and could quote some to me. Yet, he seemed powerless to interpret them to his present state or understand them. It was frustrating to me in some ways...But I know that I need to harness those feelings and put them in perspective. He felt welcomed and drawn to us. Rightly so, he knows God and His love for sure. He knows the power of God. Yet, in some ways he doesn't acknowledge his present state of relapse and the way he has been mastered by drugs. He is a victim of his own choices and the misleading of others. This is for sure. His mind is clouded and not processing life's events. If feels offended that we would say his drugs are bad. Yet, I tell him, "You are not your drugs. You are a person that I love and God does unfathomably more. Your drugs are bad. You are not." I say one thing and he hears another. What does he actually hear? I don't know for sure. Through his clouded thoughts and mixed words I cant really interpret. I seek to express love to him that is strong and ready to take actions. I desire to aid in and work through all that he is dealing with. But, for now he is back on the street and I will look for him. Prayer, I am learning, is the only way he will be drawn back to God. He is Gods child and workmanship. This situation is rather heavy on my mind I guess...But it is definitely a prayer concern. It is a part of life here and its things I enjoy working through in my work.
 
The rest of the night was really good. I met up with a group of friends here in the city. We walked around for a while and enjoyed the amazing time that is New Years Eve in Amsterdam. I anticipate all that this new year will bring with it. Its potential is so very big. I can't even rap my head around it all, I guess! Take care everyone...In Him...Will
 
Posted by willstacken at 14:39:29 | Permanent Link | Comments (3) |

December 27, 2006

a ship called "Life"

Hey One and All

First off, MERRY CHRISTMAS. I hope that you are reading this post with the peaceful feeling this side of the Christmas season tends to bring. My time here in Amsterdam has been so very busy. I will seeks to give a synopsis of it all...

Our plane touched down in Amsterdam around 8am-ish. And from there on the next 6-7 days ran together. We had much to do in prep for the large Christmas outreach we do at the Cleft. From shopping for and preparing food...to organizing volunteers...But the most important part was all the people we spent them with. The people that come in to the Cleft over the Christmas season carry with them such a longing for relationship. Many of them do not have healthy or any contact with there families. They build a community of the other people on the street. But, the nice thing is we get a chance to be a part of that community. We are a part of there network and life. Thus, we bring influence. 

On Christmas day we served a big brunch for all our friends. About 150 or so came through. I was able to take a break in that day and have a meal with 4-5 of the guys I have known for about a year now. They are all older Dutch men in there 50-60s.  We sat and enjoyed a meal together while a friend of mine Claire played Christmas carols...in sort of mocking/fun way they joined in...We ate, sang and laughed together. We could have been sitting in someones home together. That place was for a moment transformed into a large Heavenly living room that was "prepared for them." For a time it felt as though all the problems they had accumulated were simply checked at the door. These people felt like family...I can honestly say that there are few places I would have rather been. These are people I care about and that need people in there lives that care about them in a way that introduces Christ to them. Its times like these that I really enjoy my work with the Cleft. 

On Christmas Eve day I went to my friend Claire's house to have dinner with her and her family. It was awesome of her to invite me over! We had terrific dinner and Christmas time together. Her mom in Irish and her dad is English...They're hilarious together...Plus they live in the Netherlands so that only adds to the atmosphere...

Well that was my Christmas season...I hope you are all well...Stay in touch!

Will
Posted by willstacken at 16:23:22 | Permanent Link | Comments (0) |

December 12, 2006

Barcelona - day 3

Hey Guys

 I am now at the beginning of my third day here in Barcelona. For those of you who do not know, I am taking a much needed vacation down here in the south of Spain. I am here for 8 days with an American friend named Sean, who I work with in Amsterdam. Its been so refreshing to have some time away from Amsterdam. I really love the city and the work I do within it, I love having the chance to know God in the middle of such an amazing place like this. However, I need a break sometimes to catch my breath...get my bearings back...refocus my heart and mind on God. Submitting to His will and ways...

 But...Our trip here has been a total blast thus far. We have had the chance to meet a lot of nice people from all over the world who have given us directions, advice, and just plain enjoyment from being around. Our first night here we met these two nice American girls who were studying in Frankfurt. We had dinner with them and just walked around the city. It was really nice. Barcelona is really a beautiful city. It has SUCH a different feel from Amsterdam. It  reminds me a lot of Rome actually...But...All is good here. Its a blessing to be able to spend this much quality time with God and relax a bit too...Take Care...in Him...Will

Posted by willstacken at 10:07:08 | Permanent Link | Comments (1) |

November 07, 2006

life, among other things

 
hello one and all..
 
Today is a rather brisk Tuesday and I wanted to share a bit. Its been very busy but also good. I am  really kicking myself that I don't do this more often...I really do have so much to share and I always feel so pressed for time! so...here's a fun story.
 
This past week we had a group of 9 people come YWAM Germany. They came to help us and serve us at the Cleft for 9 days. I was really able to be a part of there time here. I was there leader on Tuesday afternoon evangelism ministry in the Red Light District. Also, 3 of the guys came and played soccer with on Wednesday. Then on Thursday 4 of them staffed the open-hall ministry to the homeless and lonely guys which was a huge success. But, the culmination of the week (in my eyes) was on Friday. I found out that I was only person from my team available (and qualified) to teach them on Abuse, Addiction and Recovery related topics. This was big step for me. I have taught and preached many times, but never on these specific topics. So I spend a evening reviewing my material and drawing up my outline, and taught for 2 hours that next day. I spoke in English and then one of the girls translated it into Dutch. Wow, it was SOOOO powerful. I felt so blessed to be used in that way by God. They were able to share stuff and speak about abuse that they had suffered in life, I was able to share stories and healing from my own life..It was beautiful for sure. So that's me and a bit of whats going on it my life...take care all...stay in touch!
 
in Him...will
Posted by willstacken at 13:19:35 | Permanent Link | Comments (0) |

October 17, 2006

inspirations and aspirations

Autumn is quickly approaching us here in Amsterdam. It came late, but it now grows colder by the day. It is welcome, for it brings with it the beauty of colors and less tourists. I am enjoying my apartment quite a bit. Its small but nice, I share it with a Scottish guy named Sam. He also is on staff with YWAM here in the city. Its 2 bedrooms, a living room and a kitchen. We are quite thrilled about it.

Ministry is going quite well. I have cut back a bit for the next couple of months. I am spending Monday afternoons now doing teaching at the Cleft. It has about 15-20 people in it from all over YWAM Amsterdam. The teaching is on Addictive Behavior Counseling. Its 8 weeks of Family Systems, Behavioral Addictions, Chemical Addictions, Counseling methods, and Process Groups. I am leading a Process Group. This is one of my favorite things. Its a therapeutic tool that with a structure to it that seeks to create a safe environment for sharing and healing. Its soooo good. So thats now a big part of my work here. I am still leading the Thursday afternoon ministry at the Cleft. Its going quite well. Relationships are forming more and between the staff and homeless guys the come thru our doors. As a leader I am seeking to cover the details as I can so that my staff and volunteers are free to minister as much as possible..."serve your heart out so other can do the same"...

I ran the Amsterdam 1/2 marathon. It was a blast. I ran a 1:41:39 for 13.1 miles which works out to 7:46 minutes per mile. Thats a new record for me. 6 minutes faster than last year. It was a really fun face this year. Some friends of mine ran it too this year. They all did really well also.

Also I am now doing constructions work in one of our YWAM building here...its only 4 hours a weeks as my support work for the base, I really enjoy it though. Its nice to still be able to do that kind of physical work. I miss to be honest.

Well...Thats a bit about my life here. I desire to be more consistent in this, but its just the way that way life goes I guess. I pray that you all are well. Take Care...

in Him....Will

Posted by willstacken at 13:05:37 | Permanent Link | Comments (0) |

September 26, 2006

as for the last months...

Life has been busy to say the least...These past 2 months have seen me travel back the States for 2 weeks...Have multiple speaking engagements...Many-Many meetings...Move to a new apartment...So its been crazy...Let me start with my trip to the States.
 
This trip was many months in the making. I had appointments to make and plans to settle. Lots of prep work. However, it all payed off in the end. I was so very blessed. I was able to spend time seeing my parents. I hadn't seen them for a year. I could see right away how much I had changed...and they as well. I had matured so much, I could see this in the way that I related to them. It was nice to see that kind of growth within me. Its just me becoming an adult more and more. I loved seeing them. As an only child, I really grew up with them. However, since they have yet to see my life in Amsterdam they cannot grasp this new part of me and my life. Its become so much of my heart. My worldview has taken shape in a way that can only be sculpted by the fingers of God. I am blessed!...I also got to see my supporters and this was also a relief...to talk business, butmoreover, to discuss life and our walks with Christ. THIS is was I adore. Also my church family was a huge blessing. It was nice to come home to all this.
 
I was also able to see some great friends. Some I have known since I was 15...We drank coffee...Had a cigar of two...Went for hikes...We even got up to Duluth MN for a couple days. That was SOOOO good for me. There has always been something special about that town and me. I just love it. Anyway. I was also able to stop by Northwestern College, where I graduated from. I visited friends that still attended there and chatted with professors. This was such a huge blessing.
 
Then after this short and compact trip I touched down back home in Amsterdam. This was a relief. I had come to miss it while I was away. This is the city that captures my heart. I love it here so much! I am staying in a different building for only couple of weeks then I move in to my new apartment. I am very much looking forward to it. I was able to relax a bit when I came back...But also take a deep breath with God. My trip, with all its prep work, left me exhausted spiritually. I just got wayyyy to busy. I began to miss the Jesus I love so much. So coming back was a relief. And this is where I find myself now. I am back now 2 weeks and its been terrific. I look forward to the Autumn here in Amsterdam. I stand here a blessed man. One who knows where he has come from...one who is thankful for the the redemptive work within...and One anticipates the years to come....
 
always journeying with Him...will
Posted by willstacken at 18:09:31 | Permanent Link | Comments (0) |